First 5's LIttle Steps May 2009



Spring Fever: Symptoms and Remedies by Tulum Dothee Spring is here! Yipee! At Oakhaven we have been treated to one gorgeous show of color after another. You should see the apple trees. They are a riot of pink and white blossoms. Mother earth has awoken and is showing us her best. We all are eager to get out and enjoy spring fun. Gardening is at the top of our lists. We are turning beds, adding amendments, starting seeds, planting starts. Some of our beds are so tangled by last year’s growth that getting started is overwhelming. The garden is the perfect metaphor for what happens to each of us every spring. We have to clear out the old to make room for the new. Every year I am surprised by how the old manifests. Here is what I see in the children. Heck, who am I fooling? I see it in all of us: We cry at the drop of the hat. We pick fights with friends and family. We are ornery and defiant. We throw temper tantrums. We reply “No!” to everything, even to stuff we want to try or do. We sneak, cheat, lie, whine and complain. Nothing is ever good enough. We want, want, want. NOW! While there is nothing like a power struggle to get the blood going, I gotta tell you this is hard work. It’s not just us either, my phone is ringing off the hook with older kids and parents looking for help. And did I mention? Many of you adults are right there too. Yep folks it’s the Spring Rebirth. Here’s how it works: The weather has changed dramatically and our bodies are barometers. We undergo dramatic growth spurts, physically, emotionally and spiritually. We are hungry all the time and prefer carbs and sugar when we really need more protein, veggies, fruit and whole grains. There are too many sugar holidays in spring and we are reeling from blood sugar imbalances. The time change has messed up our inner balances. We are staying up later and getting less sleep when we need more. Since the weather is changing and the days are lengthening the children wonder, “Does that mean everything else has changed?” For them even more has changed: All of their favorite clothes from last summer no longer fit. All of their favorite toys are no longer fun because they’ve undergone such growth that they need more challenging stuff. They are grieving the loss of the child they were were, the clothes they loved, the way things were. When we don’t tell them the rules are the same even though everything else is different (and they need to know that, it’s the developmental phase they’re in) they test our boundaries. It’s no wonder we are in upheaval. So here’s what to do: Remind our selves that this happens every spring, it is the cycle of life Be loving and compassionate. Restate boundaries, rules and policies. Implement the: Ask, tell, act policy: Ask them to do something once: “Please put your bowl on the counter.” Wait 30 seconds. Tell them once. “Your bowl goes on the counter.” Hand them the bowl. Wait 30 seconds. Say nothing. Act: Choose one: You take the bowl to the counter and leave the room. Say nothing. Guide them to the counter (go around behind them and wrap your arms around them, hold the bowl with them and walk to the counter and place the bowl on it with them.) Say nothing. Hand them the bowl and leave the room. Say nothing. Do not encourage, remind, nag or negotiate. Move as many activities as you can outside. Set up in the shade. Wear sun screen and hats. Stay outside as much as you can. Lay on quilts and read books for rest time. And do rest, we are exhausted. Eat outside. Dig up weeds. Release the old. Plant anything. Embrace the new. Try on those outgrown clothes. Laugh at how silly they look. Marvel at how everyone’s grown. Allow your children the space they need to have their feelings, grieve the losses, let go of that which no longer serves them. Be supportive and loving without trying to change, fix, alter. Explore your losses. Your child is growing, becoming independent, embracing themselves, needing you less. Your role is changing. Do a little grieving of your own. Remember: Summer is right around the corner. This too will pass. Tulum Dothee is a credentialed and certified educator and counselor, with 30+ years experience teaching and working with families. For more information visit her website at www.oakhavenmontessori.com. Swine Flu by First 5 Nevada County What can you do to protect your babies and young children from Swine Flu? Follow Center for Disease Control guidelines: wash your and your child’s hands frequently, stay away from anyone you know is sick, and do the things that generally help to keep us in good health: get plenty of sleep, be physically active, manage your stress, eat nutritious food and drink plenty of fluids. If you are nursing your child, continue to do so: this is the best protection you can give your child. If you are thinking of weaning, think about waiting until this epidemic has passed. According to the Center for Disease Control, the symptoms of Swine Flue are “similar to the symptoms of regular human flu and include fever, cough, sore throat, body aches, headache, chills and fatigue. In children emergency warning signs that need urgent medical attention include: Fast breathing or trouble breathing Bluish skin color Not drinking enough fluids Not waking up or not interacting Being so irritable that the child does not want to be held Flu-like symptoms improve but then return with fever and worse cough Fever with a rash “ For more information, visit http://www.cdc.gov/h1n1flu/swineflu_you.htm First 5 and Prop 1D Did you know that Californians are voting in a special election on May 19th? There are six ballot initiatives designed by the legislature to help address the State’s fiscal problems. One of the ballot initiatives, Proposition 1D, called “Children’s Services Funding,” would redirect up to 65% of First 5 dollars away from local initiatives and toward state initiatives for the next five years. For First 5 Nevada County, if Proposition 1D passes it means that instead of the $896,000 in revenues we are receiving this year, we will receive $400,000 in each of the next five years. We would have to seriously reduce the funding we provide to programs such as this newsletter, parent support groups, three family resource centers, two School Readiness programs, the KARE Crisis Nursery, home visiting programs for new parents and for stressed families, health insurance for children, and mental health services, among many other services for families of young children. If it passes, Proposition 1D will provide $268 million a year to the State General Fund which represents just under .7% (less than 1%) of the approximately $40 billion needed to close the current budget gap. Visit our website for more information about First 5 Nevada County. Is Anger a Symptom of Postpartum Depression? by Gayle Peterson, MSSW, LCSW, PhD QUESTION: I feel happy most of the time, but I become angry at my husband over very trivial things. He is loving, but I make him feel as if nothing he does is good enough. I NEVER get angry at my baby; for her I have an abundance of patience. Do I have postpartum depression? ANSWER: Perhaps your "blow-ups" have more to do with adjustment to motherhood rather than "depression" per se. Because you are under pressure to be eternally patient with your baby, you may have to "let off steam" with your husband because this is more acceptable than expressing it to your child. It would be more likely to fall under "postpartum depression" if you were directing it at your child. However, because you are not, I prefer to label it "postpartum adjustment syndrome." While the term "depression" may fit the definition of feelings that are suppressed, "adjustment" reflects the normalcy of a wide range of feelings that come up for women during this period of enormous physical and emotional change. Society fails to support women at this time because normal feelings do not get addressed unless they are labeled "depression!" Your body has endured many changes, hormonally and otherwise. New motherhood means that you have less time to take care of yourself or your husband. And it is natural for you to focus your energies primarily on your baby in the beginning as you get to know her and what she needs from you. But as you master the complexity of this profound change in your life, you will be able to again turn your energy to the marriage. Begin by evaluating whether you have been able to recover your sense of self from the pregnancy. How do you feel about your relationship to your body since your daughter was born? How did the childbirth go for you? Have you recovered from the psychological and physiological impact of the previous year? It is essential to take care of yourself as a mother. Often, continued agitation with others masks unresolved loss that has not found expression. And because you may feel so blessed with your child, the downside of motherhood may not be acknowledged. Speak with your husband about your joy and losses in becoming a mother. Ask him to share both the happiness of new fatherhood and the ways it has changed his life that he misses. Grieving together and being aware of the downside of these changes in no way reflects on your love and happiness for your baby, or the "rightness" of your decision to become parents. You may also benefit from joining a new-mother's group and developing friendships with other women going though similar life changes. Once you have found some time for yourself, you may also discover that you have more patience for your husband. Consider scheduling some quality time alone together. Refocus your attention on your relationship. Your couples' bond forms the garden in which your child grows. She will experience the increased harmony in the home that results from the realignment of her parents' relationship, as well as her mother's self-care! Gayle Peterson, MSSW, LCSW, PhD is a family therapist specializing in prenatal and family development. Visit her website at www.makinghealthyfamilies.com An Observer of Birth by Laurie Chamberlin, CD, ICCE, LE A guttural moan, a sound so intense, it is primal and instinctively beautiful. Her baby's just-born head rotates as her uterine contraction ends and she rests. Breathing, resting, she waits for the next one to begin. She reaches, touches, feels the wet, soft feathery hair on the top of her baby's head, boy or girl - still unknown, the anticipation literally moments away. Just wondering, I am, the doula, the observer, how does it feel to the baby to feel it’s mothers fingers softly touch the head for the first time. Is the baby feeling anticipation too? The next contraction begins, she squeezes her husband's hand, he is engaged, the look of utter excitement shining in his eyes. He loves her and he loves the moment, like no other time in his life. He is at this moment about to become a father of a baby on the outside. The contraction builds and she pushes with all her strength, her baby's body slips and slides right out into the doctor's capable hands. I capture the look of the mother and father on film. Eyes glowing, their beings radiating with joy as they gaze at their much-desired baby for the first time. Tears of joy abound, the baby reaching, looking toward his parent's voices. The baby, a beautiful boy, is placed on his mother's chest. Again, I snap a photo with my camera and with my mind's eye, forever embedded. A family moment captured. The three look so perfect, so meant to be together. The coos, the loving words, the melting and bonding that is taking place at this moment is at its highest form. She feels so relieved to have the reward of her hard work. Instantly, she says, she would do it all again to have this moment, tears pouring out the corners of her eyes, down her cheeks and making their way to her baby's chest. Her husband is wiping her tears with loving hands, and I witness a look of love between them that I cherish for the rest of my life. Laurie Chamberlin, CD, ICCE, LE teaches childbirth preparation classes, lactation classes and is a prenatal counselor serving the Grass Valley/Nevada City/Auburn area. For more information contact: www.lauriechamberlin.com \| lauriechamberlin@comcast.net or call 477-5442		It's Time for Kindergarten Registration! Children who will be 5 years of age on or before December 2, 2009, are eligible for kindergarten. The schedule is posted on the home page of first5nevco.org under News & Events. Become a Fan Become a fan of First 5 Nevada County on Facebook Articles There are some great parenting articles on the First5Nevco.org website. Check out... Again! Again! The Importance of Ritual in Kid's Lives Siblings: Helping Your Children Appreciate the Gift of One Another Staying Healthy in Cold and Flu Season May Events May 9 Kid's Fishing Derby The Kids Fishing Derby will be held at Malakoff Diggins State Park in the old town of North Bloomfield. Kids 15 yrs and under fish free at our Blair Lake. The awards ceremony with prizes will be held at 2:00 p.m. on our Skidmore Lawn. The event is limited to the first 100 kids and all contestants must pre-register. Free Lunch is available for contestants. Bring a picnic lunch and lawn chairs for the family. Phone: 265-2740 May 9 - 10 Cain’s Crossing Renaissance Faire Auburn Regional Park. Saturday 10-6pm & Sunday 10-5pm. $10 general admission, $5 Seniors, $5 ages 5-12; FREE under 5 cainscrossing.org May 10 Spring Open House at Empire Mine Empire Mine State Park, 10791 E. Empire St., GV. 11am-4pm. $3 for adults 17+; $1 for children 6-16; Free for children under 6 Phone: 273-8522 empiremine.org May 10 Mother's Day Brunch - Truckee Choice of entrees, Eggs Benedict, Seafood Crepes or French Toast. Truckee Donner Sierra Apartments, 10040 Estates Drive, Truckee. Cost $12 for Adults; $6 children 12 and under. Phone: 550-7600 May 12 Newborn Care Class A class for all first time pregnant parents, put this one on your baby shower list as a gift! 6pm to 8:30pm. Fee $30. Reserve your space. Phone: 477-5442 lauriechamberlin@comcast.net May 15 On Ensemble, an Arts for the Schools Event - Truckee Featuring four of the most promising young taiko artists, the On Ensemble combines seemingly disparate artistic elements into a cohesive whole. Musical influences ranging from jazz to electronic come together with the aural power of the taiko (Japanese drum) and the visual aesthetic of Japanese dance. The result is an innovative and unique performance that cannot be easily classified or forgotten. 7 pm, North Tahoe High School Theater. Tickets are $15 for adults, $5 for students. Season tickets available at considerable savings. Visit Phone: 582-8278 artsfortheschools.org onensemble.org May 15 -17 Penn Valley Rodeo PV Community Rodeo Assoc. PV Rodeo Grounds - Spenceville Rd.@ Penn Valley Drive. Schedule posted on web. Phone: 432-1802 pvrodeo.com May 16 Museum Discovery Day Visit five Western Nevada County Museums: Grass Valley Museum, North Star Powerhouse, Imaginarium, Firehouse Museum, Railroad Museum . Sponsored by GV Chamber, NC Chamber, and Superintendent of Schools. 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. FREE. Phone: 273-4667 nevadacitychamber.com May 21 Free Prenatal Breastfeeding Class Sponsored by Future Generations Free two hour class to help get breastfeeding off to a good start. 6:30 to 8:30pm. Reserve your space. Phone:.477-5442 lauriechamberlin@comcast.net May 26 - June 23 Childbirth Preparation Class Taught by birth educator Laurie Chamberlin, CD, ICCE. Comfort techniques, pain medication options, develop coping skills for labor, prepare for the birth of your baby! 6:00 to 8:30pm, 5 consecutive classes. Reserve your space. Phone:.477-5442 lauriechamberlin@comcast.net June Events June 6 Children’s Art at the Nevada County Certified Growers Market Held on the first Saturday of the month at the Nevada County Fairgrounds from 9 a.m. – 11:00 a.m. FREE thegrowersmarket.com June 6 Friends of the LIbrary Book Sale 1st Saturday of Every Month - Monthly Used Book Sale, Friends of the Nevada County Libraries. Foley Historical Library, 211 N. Pine St., NC. 9am-3pm. Find quality children's books for 25 cents. Phone: 265-7050. June 8 - 12 My First Science Camp Science camp for preschoolers. Through a variety of hands on activities including music, art, and food, these little campers will explore the Puzzle of Nature: Soil, Air, Water, and Sun. Held at the Imaginarium. 9a.m.-11a.m. Ages 4-5. Fee: $110. To Reserve space in any class: Phone: 478-6400, ext. 231 or Email: helena@nevco.k12.ca.us Ongoing Events Enrolling Now Baby & Me Join in for songs, playtime, and discussion while getting to know other parents and babies. Join an existing group now. Birth to 12 months. Weekday mornings at the Grass Valley Methodist Church in downtown Grass Valley. FREE to first-time participants, sliding scale fee up to $50 for 10 sessions for subsequent groups. Phone: Meg 913-2745 e-mail: meg@first5nevco.org first5nevco.org/programs.cfm Enrolling Now Toddler & Me Join in for songs and playtime in a preschool setting while getting to know other parents and toddlers. We are creating new groups now for children 12 to 24 months. Monday mornings at the T.K. McAteer Family Resource Center in Nevada City. FREE to first-time participants, sliding scale fee up to $45 for 9 sessions for subsequent groups. Phone: Samie 265-0611 x223 e-mail: samie@first5nevco.org first5nevco.org/programs.cfm Ongoing Early Pregnancy Consultation Mention the First 5 Newsletter to receive 50% off. Now only $27.50. For women in their first or second trimester. Consultations scheduled regularly. Call to schedule: 477-5442 lauriechamberlin.com Mondays Mother Dance Dance class for moms and pre-walking babies designed to nourish and nurture both Mom and baby with an opportunity to connect intimately through touch, movement, rhythm and dance! Mondays 10:30-11:30. Cost $10/class. Moving Ground Studio, Grass Valley Phone: 272-4240 Wednesdays “Your Amazing Infant” - Truckee A series for parents and their infants, ages birth through 3 months. On Wednesdays, noon to 1:15pm at Sierra Mountain Community Education Center in Truckee. These classes increase bonding through nurturing touch and physical interaction between parent and child. Drop-in at any time. Cost for a series of 6 classes is $72.00 with scholarships available. Call the Early Learning Project at 582-2583. Wednesdays & Fridays Toddler Gym Time - Truckee Toddlers and their parents enjoy free play in the big gym with an array of exciting developmental equipment. Have fun, meet new friends and build new skills. Sierra Mountain Community Education Center in Truckee. Ongoing sessions follow the school schedule. Parent-facilitated and free to families. Wednesdays and Fridays, 10-Noon. Call 582-2583 or email rhall@ttusd.org for information. Thursdays Music Together - Truckee New session begins in June Children birth to 4 and their parents will enjoy this research-based program that includes songs, instrument play and movement in a relaxed and playful setting. Sierra Mountain Community Education Center in Truckee. $130 for the series and materials. Scholarships available. Call 582-2583 to save a spot. Fridays “Baby and Me” - Truckee New series begins May 8 Ongoing series through out the year. Fridays, 9:30-10:45 at Sierra Mountain Community Education Center in Truckee. These popular classes provide education, support, informal discussion and interactive fun for parents and non-ambulatory infants, 3 months to 1 year old. The class fee is $84.00 with scholarships available. Call: Early Learning Project: 582-2583.

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